Accident prone

I have one friend who collects broken bones, cuts and bruises and insect bites the way other people collect stamps or shells. To the casual observer, you might think he is accident prone. I think, however, that he probably suffers about the same amount of mishaps as anyone else with the same lifestyle: he goes for long forest walks and picnics (hence the insect bites), rides a bicycle whenever he can in spite of the fact that his environment is not very bicycle-friendly (hence the broken bones), and does all the home repairs he possibly can (hence the regular cuts and bruises). Calling him accident prone is basically the same as accusing the one who does the dishes of being clumsy because he or she drops the occasional dish (childhood trauma peeking through here): it goes with the territory.

I have another friend who attracts bad luck in a very different way: he is constantly getting himself into situations that he could easily have avoided with even a whiff of common sense, and is then strangely surprised when people take advantage of him. And again, you might think that he is accident prone, while in fact he himself creates the conditions for his misfortune.

To me,  "accident prone" only applies if the person involved suffers more than average numbers of mishaps, all other things (including their own behaviour) being equal. And according to that definition, I am accident prone, but my condition is an extremely rare and exotic one, applying only to airport toilets and trolleys. 

Here's the thing: slightly more than half the times I need to go to the men's room at an airport, they are either closed for repairs or for cleaning. And the same with airport trolleys: I seem to have an uncanny knack of systematically choosing the one with a wheel that doesn't work, so that the trolley lists to one side constantly, and forces me to make a spectacle of myself by traversing the arrival hall at an angle, and puffing slightly from the effort. And the fact that I was unable to relieve myself because of the closed toilets does not help, I can tell you.

As a child, it was the other way around: I was unusually lucky in cards, and on becoming King for a Day: on Three Kings' day - the sixth of January - my mother would bake a cake and hide a trinket in it. The cake was then divided among family members and sometimes friends, and one to find the trinket became King for a Day. I found it eight times out of ten.

Looking back at what I just wrote, I cannot help thinking that this is some kind of instant karma (instant in the sense that it happens within a single lifetime, not from one life to the next): I had my share of extra luck, however trivial, as a child, and am now compensating for it by trivial misfortunes in other areas. 

All complete poppycock, of course, but still ...